Permission to Give Up
Highly Sensitive People are known to be deep in their feelings. A lot. Given that reality, I think poetry is an art that speaks to the soul of many HSPs. I, however, am not one of them.
Until recently.
I recently stumbled upon a beautifully written and deeply authentic poem, EVERY DAY, I GIVE UP by Rudy Francisco. His website describes him as “one of the most recognizable names in Spoken Word Poetry” and while I am not well-versed in any form of poetry, I definitely don’t know a thing about Spoken Word Poetry.
But this poem spoke to me.
I’m sharing it here, because I think it might speak to you too.
As HSPs, we often live life in a state of overwhelm, our nervous systems flooded with stimuli, our hearts heavy with empathy, and our souls tired from carrying the weight of it all.
As HSPs, sometimes we feel like giving up. And we can… for a little while.
Giving up isn’t all-or-nothing. Just because you give up for twenty minutes doesn’t mean you can’t start again at minute twenty-one.
Through this lens, giving up is resting. It’s pausing. It’s giving oneself permission to take a break when it’s needed. It’s allowing yourself to stop doing and just be.
HSPs are often chronic over-workers with a strong tendency toward people-pleasing (click here to read more about HSPs and people-pleasing). As people who fall under the neurodiversity umbrella, we are prone to burnout.
Giving up can help HSPs recover from burnout.
Here’s how… giving up is not the end of the road. It’s just one stop of many that you take on your journey. Whether you’re focused on a specific goal or milestone, or you’re just trying to get through the day, week, or month, there will be times when you feel defeated. When you need to set your ambition down, put your motivation to the side, and let your body, heart, mind, and soul rest.
That’s giving up.
But if you look back on your patterns in life, you’ll likely notice that you don’t give up forever. Your “giving up” is just pausing, taking a break, allowing yourself to rest when you need it. You always get back up and push through.
Words matter. The way we talk to ourselves matters. Our inner dialogue, often overtaken by our inner critic, matters.
The next time your inner critic judges you for giving up or shames you for stopping, I hope you will think of Rudy’s poem and remember that giving up is not a permanent decision. It’s a choice you make minute to minute. When you choose to give up for twenty minutes or twenty years, you’re taking the break you need. You can always make a different choice twenty-one minutes or twenty-one years later.
At Therapy for Highly Sensitive People, we understand what it’s like to live with high sensitivity. We understand what giving up means and how to support you through all the stops on your journey. If you’re looking for support from therapists who get it, please reach out. We’re here for you.
If you want to learn more about Rudy Francisco, Button Poetry (who publishes his books), or Spoken Word Poetry, here are a few links.
Also, EVERYDAY, I GIVE UP is just one of many soulful poems in Rudy’s book, Excuse Me As I Kiss the Sky. If you’re moved to buy it like I was, you won’t be disappointed.
